Syawal 1439H

Syawal 2018 

Syawal 1439H 

Days 1 - 3 

she's two!

so little babe turned two end of May, and of courseeee we had a small celebration for her. as previous year, we called for a birthday iftar for both families.

its more meaningful this time because she already knew what a birthday is and was able to soak in the limelight.

babygirl had two cakes - for our family iftar and for her school. how lucky!

and nope, i didnt bake anything this round, because #makpenat.

some pictures below, #formemoriessake.
and probably if you need party ideas for dessert tables and stuffs.

for the family iftar, my invite was for about 25 pax in total including children.

• family iftar meals: Satayboy (for mee rebus, roti kirai and chicken curry, with putri salat and samosa) / mee hoon birthday by my Mak 
• family iftar side dishes: Yummy Takoyaki / add-ons by self (hashbrown pops, pepes wraps and nuggets)
• family iftar desserts: Chendol Kain Pelikat / Rizq Delights / Keria.Sg / add-ons by self 
• family iftar birthday cake: I Am Cafe's 5-layered Rainbow Cake with cream cheese filling

• dessert corner: DIY - mini Milos, Ritz cheese biscuits, marshmallows, puddings
• family door gifts: DIY - tea, Redondo wafers, Tim Tams
• birthday banners/balloons: DIY Rainbow theme (balloons not in pic)

• school birthday cake: Prima Deli Sg's Rainbow Connection with Strawberry Cream Filling
• school goodies bags: DIY - tangram set, packet drink, rainbow cookies, rainbow marshmallows, chocolate biscuits and jellie cups 

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Satayboy
do i need to even review Satayboy? i mean, oh come on. their much raved satays were amazeballs, their mee rebus flavorful. i would even appoint them as my official caterer moving forward.
dealing with them was also breezy, although delayed replies are expected. otherwise, good food, good transaction.

Yummy Takoyaki
this wasnt the first time we had them. my family lovesss their takoyaki and just kept repeating orders. and their delivery timings didnt fail too - always on time.
they used to pour their sauces before hand, but now they dont. i mean, the takoyakis get soggy after a while and to prevent that, YT separate the takoyakis and sauces for you to pour in accordance to your eating time. nice kannn.

Rizq Delights
such an easy breezy transaction! i was the one delaying replies because i couldnt decide what to order from them. and ended up with just their fruit tarts after reviewing my food list. so much pretty desserts they have! i have had their desserts before too, and once again, top taste.

Keria.Sg
you know some kerias would be hard the next day and its not nice to eat? Keria.Sg isnt like that! i was very amazed! our first time ordering from them, and my oh my they taste good! not too sweet, very soft textured. and still delicious the next day? ouhhjyes!

Chendol Kain Pelikat
again our repeat order from them. a little too sweet for my liking but thats easily solved by adding water. one bottle could actually feed two! i love how they are prompt at delivery and comes in a cooler box complete with ice to keep the chendol cold. sweet gesture, i like!

I Am Cafe 
my family loves their cakes since forever. my mum have a special place in her heart for their red velvet cake. and given the party is rainbow theme, of course i have to get their rainbow cake. only thing was, i couldnt decide a seven or five-layered cake. i went with five because i didnt want too much wastage and figured not many will eat cake after stuffing themselves with other foods.
i was disappointed though, with the outlook of their cake. i felt the Happy Birthday message was sloppily written and given the name was for a girl, they could have used red cream instead of blue. i even texted my mum that the cake is small, about 6-7". tall, but small. i expected something bigger.
they dont have any cake image for you to view, no options for what cream, what color, whatnots. it was simply "Okay what cake you want, when and what message?" kinda thing.
i wish they had paid a little more attention to the cake details.
oh, for this cake, i paid about SGD90.00 without delivery.

Prima Deli Sg
the place to go for todds! i love how the cake is big and short. hahahh. and its good sponge cake for toddlers - light, creamy and less sweet. score! and ooh the colors were so vibrant - suitable for pre schoolers to wow at the cake. i supposed its readily available at Prima Deli, otherwise ordering it is also easy breezy.

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now onto the babyboy's birthday planning. hahahh. 

stack em up!

So it was Mother's Day on Sunday 13 May 2018.

nothing fancy for me, no wishes, no dinner, no presents, no appreciations. zilch. not even a kiss.
really? am i that unimportant? is my role that insignificant? after all that i've put in and given?
no, i'm not being calculative. not with my children.

but really? wow.
its simply my duty to fulfill all these, huh.

just any other day.
so much for my day, indeed.








happy thoughts!
made mini brownies tower for my neighbor-mummies, and a whole brownies cake for the office mummies. unfortunately couldn't deliver it on Monday due to girl fallen ill. so the office had a belated mummies' cake.

top: side view of chocolatey fudgey brownies tower/stack consisting of 9-12 pieces of brownies, with pieces of strawberries.

below: top view of the mini tower.

as for the brownie cake, its four layers tall of cut chocolatey fudgey brownies, with Hershey's chocolate sauce and strawberries. so sinful, so heavenly.. pretty somewhat majestic. suited for all working mummies out there.

nothing cures heart pain better than chocolates, yes?
happy mom's day to all :)

do i take orders for this?
yes i do :)

a line a day, all day, every day.

I found this journal by chance at Typo, and I was actually contemplating if I should get it. Glad I did buy it! 

I mean, why shouldnt I?

There's a question for every day for 365 days, for three years! Although the questions were repeated, I'm sure it beats having writer's block at any day.

I'm such a sucka for pretty things. Hahahh. 

And the questions.. oh the questions! Some are rather close to the heart, some makes me think, and some are just triggers the emotions. You know? 

The daily questions are: 

1)        What inspired you the most today?

2)        What do you love most about the weekend?

3)        Where and when was your last selfie?

4)        Sometimes when I’m alone, I like to …

5)        What is your favorite song now?

6)        What makes you unique?

7)        What makes the perfect Friday night?

8)        What was the last film you saw?

9)        What’s in your fridge right now?

10)       … is a total babe.

11)       Pssst, tell me a secret!

12)       What was the last compliment you were given?

13)       Describe your day in 3 words.

14)       What are you most proud about this week? (Well done, you!)

15)       If you could go anywhere right now, where would it be?

16)       What makes you happy?

17)       Write down some advice to your younger self.

18)       Whats your guilty pleasure?

19)       If you had a million dollars, whats the first thing you'd buy?

20)       What did you wear today?

21)       Whats your happiest memory?

22)       What do you love most where you live?

23)       What do you love most where you live?

24)       What did you dream about this week?

25)       What do you love most where you live?

26)       What is your favourite website/blog?

27)       What was the last book you read?

28)       If you could have any super power, what would it be?

29)       Make a wish!

30)       What did you eat for lunch today?

31)       What are you most looking forward to? 

Wont you agree the questions make you think, like THHHiinnkk? 

I mean, if you were to compare, now and later, your answers may even be different in three months. What more a year, or three years down the line. 

Your favorite song may change, your happiest memory could change. You may not read the same book which you had procrastinate since six months ago. What you want to buy with a million dollars would change too. You know, that kinda thing. Because humans change constantly and so does their feelings and needs and wants. Thats a constant. 

Some require a little more emotion and thought - like what do you actually do when you are alone? Or what was that last compliment you were given? I definitely cannot recall the last. 

Who knows, these could be topic starters for when you have writer's block to blog! Lol.

I skipped January 2018 entries because I only had the book in Feb and could only recall as far as Feb events. January was a so-called trial for the new year so it doesn't really count. It only counts because its my birthday month. 

So far so good; Ive been updating diligently. I dont want to forget the recent happenings and I do not want to forget my constant train of thoughts either. So I reckon this journal book is actually a good kick-starter for me to pen something. 

Its supposed to be a line per day. Some days i wrote a paragraph! Its actually nice to write a short entry, noting the reasons and emotions behind it. That would make the entry all the more meaningful, isnt it? 

A line a day for three years, thats not bad ey. 

needs unsatisfied.

Nope, I still admire people with luxuries.
Inner peace cant pay my bills, unfortunately.

Without luxuries, I cannot pay my bills. Without my bills totally cleared, I cannot have inner peace.

So yes, luxuries are equally important.

birthday registry

Regardless how old I am, or at least for as long as I will remember, I will have a birthday wishlist. I mean, isn’t it easier to tell people what you want, instead of them guessing and sometimes getting stuffs you may not want and don’t use? Quite wasteful, right?

Its like a registry, so you can keep track of what was gifted. In fact, I actually purchased some items myself, as part of my resolution to care for myself better.

Actually its an ongoing list lah.

This year, I aim to have the following items:

1)      Too Faced White Chocolate Bar eyeshadow

2)      Too Faced White Peach eyeshadow

3)      Too Faced Just Peachy Mattes eyeshadow

4)      Too Faced Sweet Peach eyeshadow

5)      Bodyshop Peppermint Feet Care

6)      Sand & Sky Pink Clay mask

7)      Laneige Sleeping Mask

8)      Benefit Bad Girl Mascara

9)    SF Egyptian Dress Blue

10)  Lulu Al Hadad Kaftan

11)  Nusheennura Marble Long Dress

12)  Desigual Bag

13)  Unicorn cake

14)  Mermaid cake

15)  Ondeh-Ondeh cake

16)  Teh Tarik cake

17)  Macaron

18)  HP

19)  Laptop

20)  Fossil Rose-Gold watch

21)  Lang Leav - Love & Misadventure // Lullabies // Memories // The Universe Of Us // Sad Girls // Sea of Strangers

22)  Rupi Kaur – Milk & Honey // The Sun and Her Flowers

23)  Jojo Moyes – Honeymoon in Paris // The Girl You Left Behind // The One Plus One // Paris for One

24)  Cecilia Ahern - One Hundred Names // How to Fall in Love // The Year I Met You // The Marble Collector

25)  #88lovelife – Volumes 1 + 2 + 3

26)  Origami books/kits

27)  Hand Lettering books/kits

Of course there’s other stuffs I bought that’s not in this wishlist, like the UD All Nighter Spray and Australis Primer. I hope I could stick to this list and get these collections.

Else, there's always next year's wishlist, insya Allah ;p 

Self-Me First.

This year I started my iG with my #birthdaybuys from Times Bookstore.

Gosh that place is becoming a puaka place. I went there pretty much every day after sending Sara to school. Its like my heaven on earth.

Ok I digressed.

For this year’s resolutions, I sort of decided on many themes, one being Self Care. It means I want to attempt stuffs that I never did before and try to care for myself more than previous years. While I love my family and home, I realized I also needed to find time for myself. It doesn’t matter if I do not turn out as a professional. I want to at least be able to say, “Oh yes, Ive tried that”. 
Self Care is also about caring more and better for my skin and health, hopefully. Lately Ive gotten dry sensitive skin etc. I thought I should at least care for my body; its the only Ive got. 

So I started with a Creative Lettering and Origami kit sets. Like I captioned, I would like to think that I have time. Lol. Who are we kidding right.

Below are my 2018 Resolutions/To Attempt List of things to do:

1)      Creative Hand Lettering/Modern Calligraphy
I got my kits from Times Bookstore. Initially I just wanted to own the kits, but as time went by, I realized that typography skills and service is increasing in the market. Hence why not try my hand at it? I also printed some free printouts from online to enhance my go at letterings. I would love to go professional with it. But that’s unlikely to happen as there’s a lot in the market now. I might just do for my own people and events. We’ll just go along.

2)      Origami/Paper Quilling/Paper folding
One of my childhood dreams is to bond over origami with my children. Lets see how that goes. My girl cant even sit still for five minutes. Hahahh. Well at least I have a couple of books to guide me, and I can try to fold more that just the number cube.
I hadn’t tried quilling though. Still searching for books or online guides for me to kick off this craft. Given that I already have a few kits in hand, quilling may even be brought forward to next year. Hehh.

3)      Coloring
My #semangatlimaminit hobby then. It was so sad I stopped coloring in 2016, partly due to health. The books are almost turning yellow! I had to dust and sun them. Now I’m bringing this hobby back into my life.

4)      Art Jamming
I am reserving this session with my dear friend for our belated birthdays. I hope this materialises. We hadn’t met for a while and I miss her. And I want to spend time with her by doing something, instead of just chatting our money at Coffee Bean or something. I saw a few coupons on Fave, and found more online. So we’ll wait for this to really happen.
 

5)      Blog

I’m trying! It’s hard with two kids and trying to post something. The most is I usually pen groceries and bills lists. When I tried to write something, Sara would come over and insist to sit on my laps and write something too. That girl! Hahahh. So far I think I’m not bad for a #motheroftwo. Some blogs that I used to frequent or either dead or inactive. Chet!

6)      Baking
I did this last year. I stopped after being pregnant with Adam. Yes, I do want to start again, once again at my availability. This time I wanted to be specific with what I want to bake or attend class. I have a few on my mind, it’s just a matter of finding time and having excess money to pay for the baking courses.

7)      3-Year Reflections and Thoughts
I bought the diary from Typo. The best evuhh! It’s a journal of 365 days with 30 questions repeated for every month, for three years! And you get to read what happened last year when you do this year’s entry! How cool is that. It’s like FB Memories, on paper.

8)      Exercise
Oh why am I so ambitious. I am upset that the stomach is still flabby! So upset that I pinterested flat abs exercises (damn you, planks!) and some celebs with abs for motivation. Yes, Britney is one of them. I need to go down to my pre pregnancy weight, but its taking a long time because I am in no hurry to flatten the stomach and I still enjoy junk foods around.

9)      Memorise 4 Qul + Yasin + Doa Qunut Im not a preacher, don’t intend to be one. I don’t impose. Im not a good Muslimah, yet I always try to be one. I memorised Al-Ikhlas, Al Falaq and An Nas, so Im left with Al Kafirun. I know I have to push myself to memorize Yasin and Qunut properly. Its about being a good example to my children. Pray for me on this one.



10)   Proper Use of Make Up
Suddenly there's a interest in cosmetics. Hahahh. Not that I want to smack my face with thick make ups, but at least I want to learn to apply proper make up. You know, primer, highlighter, concealer, etc. At least make my face up properly. Hehh. I sorta have the tools, but I have no idea how to use them. So yeah, learning and applying, slowly.


11)   Homeschooling
No, I don’t mean to quit my job to homeschool the children. Heck we may not even study. I mean I want to teach the kids when I’m with them, on weekends or long holidays. Maybe print early childhood learning guides for them to learn through playing. So far I have printed alphabets, shapes, numbers and animal flashcards for Sara. Just needed to find some corner in the house as a noticeboard.

Now that I have listed the resolutions, it felt like a lot! Im really being ambitious. Hahahha.

Of course I don’t expect instant ability or professional work coming out of me. I would like to pace myself, gradually upgrade myself as time goes by. Its only February anyway! I have a whole year for these, right?

The list hadn’t include my #kitchengoals. Or #livingroomgoals. Or #bookshelfgoals. Or any other #goals. And I already think it’s a lot.

#prayforme lol

eight pieces of CCC

since I made a mess in the kitchen. 

and i made caramel chocolate cupcakes for my neighbour for her CNY. 

gave her eight pieces, because, well, lucky number. received a text after that, her telling me how it tastes sedap. makes me all fuzzywarm inside. nobody died from my cupcakes. hahaha. 

Caramel Chocolate cupcakes, with crushed Lotus biscuits in the centre and topped with Caramel SMBC. gold pearls, because wealth.

#39weeks +1

nothing much was blogged about #babyno2, partly or unfortunately due to me having no time after attending to #babyno1, work and house, and whatnots. sometimes even going to sleep gets delayed or shortened because there is always things to do.

sorry #babyno2.
i'll try to talk more about you from now on k.

so, labour story up ahead.

i chose Dr Suzanna Sulaiman from KKH to be my gynae once again. her schedule was sooo full right up to my EDD, i had to meet up with Dr Jessie Poon for a couple of appointments before having my files transferred to Dr Su. Dr Jessie was also good! lepak and chill like Dr Su. my consultations with Dr Jessie was smooth and good, i would recommend her!

compared to the firstborn's, my pregnancy journey is a smooth one and labour was a short one, Alhamdulillah. there were new experiences, but thankfully there was no complications or major hardships that i had to go through. i didnt have that awful severe morning sickness. occasional vomiting, yes. fatigue was constant. due to the increase in appetite, i put on weight a lot faster than the previous pregnancy.

i was a 70kg at 40 weeks with #babyno1; i was the same weight at 38 weeks with #babyno2. oh imagine the kilos i have to lose!

anyhoos.

03 Nov 2017 Friday: late 38 weeks
as far as i can remember, on Friday midnight to Saturday noon, #babyno2 was not moving. there were no kicks. or maybe there were, but i was on flu meds - was really drowsy and ready to sleep the night away. hence i wont be able to tell if there were kicks. usually kid would move even when i was sleeping, but i remembered sleeping through the night.

when i remembered about the baby not moving, i thought, okay maybe the kid is sleeping inside.
and i let it be.
uh huhhh. not so smart right.

04-05 Nov 2017 Saturday & Sunday: late 38 weeks
#babyno2 moved very slowly and very little. i was puzzled, and highlighted to abz that if nothing improves by night, i will have to go to the hospital.

we were still relaxed, occasionally checking if baby is still moving inside.
yes, slowly but surely.

06 Nov 2017 Monday: late 38 weeks
gynae check up. told Dr Su about the decreased fetal movement since Friday.
"why didnt you come to the hospital!" howww i knowww. sorry, my bad.
Dr Su had the placenta placement and baby's heartbeat checked - all okay, thankfully.
a decreased in fetal movement could mean (1) baby have no space to move anymore, (2) baby is stressed inside, and/or (3) baby has started to poop inside and it is not healthy.
her advice was, if everything is okay, only the baby isnt moving much, the best would be bring the kid out.

i was given about an hour to decide - to let the baby stay in my tummy till full term, ie 40 weeks, or be induced due to risks undetected for the decreased movement. 

made a quick call to abz and mum. both went, "okay go". 

ehhh koranggg. 

07 Nov 2017 Tuesday: 39 weeks

since #babyno2 is arriving a week earlier, and we hasnt gotten much prepared, abz and i had to run errands and start to prep for the kid's arrival. 

i prepped my hospital bag (yes, one day before delivery!), packed Sara's bag and outfits (because i need her to be at the hospital as soon as i delivered Adik), prepped the children's toiletries trolley. preparations here, preparations there. oh my. 

i went to sleep hugging Sara, wanting to be close to her. she had been the only one and i dont know how this whole Kakak-Adik will be.  

and because i dont know how long will this labour be, and when will i get to see her again. 

08 Nov 2017 Wednesday: 39 weeks +1

0700am 

i left the house with a heavy heart, leaving Sara behind. i would actually love to bring her into the delivery suite, if i could. 

0740am - 0840am
checked into the delivery suite,
nurses came and went, and did their paper works on me.

i was still 2.5cm dilated, as since the week before.

0900am - 0130pm
i have started to dilate proper slowly, going at 3cm.
i cannot remember in sequence but what happened was:
1) the doctors broke my water bag
2) they insert the contractions drip in me, to get the contractions going
3) i asked for epidural in case it was too late

and then we waited.
waiting for labour can be quite boring.
in between i tried to sleep, had a lot of air zam zam (to the point the nurses was saying i shouldnt drink so much), took a few ajwa dates (because it helps in dilation), supplicate as much as i could, tried to watch the telly but nothing sinked in. i even had time to reply my work emails.
i made a call to my mum, updating her on what was happening.

at the rate i was dilating, 1cm at every hour, we estimated it would be 6-7 hours before i am fully dilated and ready to give birth.

at around noon, i felt an extremely sharp pain at my right lower back. it was so excruciating that i could only lie on my right, one hand clenching the bed and the other squeezing abz's hand. i was ready to fling the bed side frame. i wasnt sure if its the contractions, but it truly felt like some knife pierced into me.
nurses tried to had me to turn, and i really couldnt. even told them to not ask me to move because i will become She-Hulk and get annoyed.
not even laughing gas could help.
one of the doctors had to give me another medicine i-dont-know-the-name to reduce the pain. a VE showed that i was 4cm dilated.
so much pain and only 4cm?!

an hour later, the nurses team started to panic.
i was fully dilated. say whhuuutttt? i shot up to 10cm within an hour?!
they started to call in my gynae, prepped the trolley with trays and equipment, prepped the baby's corner with blankets and i-dont-know-what.

0230pm 
i was supposed to practice pushing.
Dr Su was all for natural birth. so was i (because no money for c-sect, really).
my epidural dose was at the highest i heard, but somehow i had the urge to push. thanks to the fb viral balloon-pingpong video which abz showed me the week before, i contracted my stomach muscle and pushed the kid out.
as i was pushing, the midwife halfway told me to stop pushing, because "baby's head is halfway out." already?! but the gynae wasnt in the delivery suite yet!!

eh hallooo. baby's head is halfway out and you want me to stop pushing? what if the baby cant breathe? you mean let the baby stay half in me and half in the room? how do i even stop pushing?

0245pm 
abz told me to continue pushing. and i did.
less than ten pushes, and bloooob, out came the baby.

Dr Su came in a couple minutes after that. "ehhh budak ni tak tunggu eh!"
sorry, Doc.

and then, i had two kids now.

im not sure how im going to work this whole thing out, but i guess i will just try to wing it.

and then there's two.

just when i thought i was figuring this whole motherhood thing,
i became a #motheroftwo.

hello Kakak Sara.
hello Adik.

may you two be the best to each other, first and always.

not important.

you know, 

when you are disappointed time and time again, 

when you are used time and time again, 

you just begin to observe more, 

and look around more, 

and analyse more, 

and think much more. 

and you start to realise where you stand 

on how important you are to that someone 

on how much of a priority you are 

on how much you mean to that someone 

all the way right down to the very beginning

that you never actually meant to be that important

that you are important 

only when you fit the box 

only when you are needed for something 

only when you are used for something

and then you are no longer valuable 

and then you are no longer necessary 

and then you are no longer important

and you start to realise where you stand 

all the way right down to the very beginning

that you were never actually meant to be of any importance.